


I Should Be Over All The Butterflies...

by OneDirectionsErections



Series: Still Into You [1]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: A Kiss To End All Kisses, Arguing, Blow Jobs, Excessive Swearing, Exes Running Into Each Other, Explicit Sexual Content, First Love, Heartbreak, M/M, Makeup Sex, Making Out, Oral Sex, Reunions, Reunited lovers, Sexual Tension, Soulmates, Tension, True Love, mentions of lilo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-31
Updated: 2013-07-31
Packaged: 2017-12-22 00:54:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/906984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneDirectionsErections/pseuds/OneDirectionsErections
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis and Harry broke up two years ago when Harry moved to LA to work on his music career. Louis’ hurt with how it ended, and thought he was over Harry. He’s 'dating' a great guy, Liam, but when he runs into Harry at a record shop and Harry asks to get coffee Louis can’t say no.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Should Be Over All The Butterflies...

**Author's Note:**

> This originally started out as a simple one shot about two old lovers meeting again, chatting and agreeing to hang out, with one saying they weren't going to have sex… It's turned into so much more. This story is heavily based of of Paramore's 'Still Into You'.
> 
> I've decided to make this into a 'verse so I hope you guys are strapped in, cause its gonna be an intense ride.
> 
> All titles will be lyrics from 'Still Into You'
> 
> [Follow Me On Tumblr](http://direction-erections.tumblr.com) If you'd like : D

 

"Louis?"

 _'Shit!'_ Louis thinks to himself. He knows who it is before he even turns around. His body still responds like it hasn't been two years since they've seen each other.

Louis turns his head and looks over his shoulder, only to be met by the bold gaze of a man who had broken his heart.

"Shit." Louis murmurs lowly to himself, and places the albums on the rack where he's standing. He knew coming to this record store was a mistake. This had been their place after all, but the last time Louis saw Harry, Harry was leaving him for Los Angles to do the whole indie music thing.

And it sure seemed like it was going well, if Harry's look is anything to go by. Tightest of the tight black skinny jeans on legs that are way longer then the last time Louis saw Harry, a dark red shirt with a band logo that Louis' never seen before, and worn in black boots on his feet. Louis winces as he finds himself thinking how fucking good Harry looks.

He almost looks nothing like the boy who left Louis after they graduated college. Where there once had just been one tattoo, now there were more then Louis could count. Hair that was once wild and unruly, is now a little shorter, curls framing his face perfectly. Harry's body and face changed with puberty… Sharper lines, longer limbs and muscles more defined. His eyes, though, his eyes are exactly the same. Young, ambitious and alive.

All that is walking over to Louis right now. And for a split second, Louis wants to run away. Run away from the boy who ran away from him.

"Louis…" Harry smiles and stops a good two feet away from Louis. A good distance, enough to exchange the obvious quick chat they are about to have, but not so close where Louis feels uncomfortable. "I knew that was you… Could never miss that ass of yours." Harry chuckles, his voice is slow and playful, a tone Louis knows far too well.

Louis raises his eyebrow's and watches Harry wince and run a hand over his face, "Shit… I'm sor―That probably isn't the right thing to say after not seein' someone for two years."

"Probably not." Louis says, rolling his lips into his mouth.

"Let me start over, yea…" Harry says and wrings his hands together, his fingers going slightly white with the strength he was pulling them. A gesture Louis knew Harry to have when he was nervous. "Hi Louis, you look great… Funny runnin' into you 'ere. How've you been?"

Louis sighs, and has a conversation with himself in his head. This can go one of two ways… He can be a total prick and treat Harry like he always told himself he would if he ever saw him again, or he can just be the bigger man and be pleasant to Harry and get this over with quickly. Louis settles for being somewhere in the middle of the two options.

"Thanks, Harry. You look… Different." Harry quirks an eyebrow but says nothing. And Louis doesn't elaborate, doesn't want to give Harry the satisfaction of knowing how good he looks, how the whole rocker look was made for Harry. "And I'm pretty sure it's funny runnin' into you 'ere…" Louis says and turns to pick up the albums he placed on the rack, when he first saw Harry. "I seem to remember you leavin'… Didn't think there'd be the problem of runnin' into you 'ere…" Louis quips and turns to walk to the next aisle. He smiles when he sees Harry still standing where he left him, mouth agape.

Louis is looking through the letter 'N' when he finally sees Harry walk up to, and stand next to him again. He's a bit closer this time, facing the side of Louis' body as Louis searches through the albums.

"Didn't think runnin' into me would be such a problem." Harry's slow voice says lowly, sounding curt.

Louis doesn't even look over to Harry, just picks up a _Nine Inch Nails_ album, and flips it over, looking at the track list. "Yea, cause seein' someone who used to be your best friend after two years of not talkin' is a fuckin' walk in the park." Louis huffs out, a slightly bitter sounding chuckle escapes his lips.

Louis watches Harry out of his peripheral vision. Harry turns so he's leaning his back against the rack of albums and sighs loudly. He brings his hand up to his face and pinches his nose between his thumb and index finger, something he does to try and relieve stress. Louis doesn't say anything, he doesn't feel he needs to. Harry is the one that needs to explain himself. All he said to Louis when he left two years ago, was that he loved Louis, but he needed to go to LA while the opportunity was there waiting for him.

Louis tried to understand. Tried to think that he could possibly love Harry even more for going after something he wanted so much. But Louis' broken heart got the better of him, and instead of being realistic, Louis just got bitter.

"I'm sorry." Louis finally turns his head in Harry's direction. Harry is looking at the tiled floor at his feet, a crease between his eyebrows.

"Lit'le late…" Louis swallows the lump in his throat. He wasn't ready to accept Harry's apology just yet. "Don'tcha think?"

Harry sighs again, runs a hand through his curls and slaps his hand down against his thigh when it falls back to his side, "Can we just―Can we go get coffee or somethin'?" Harry turns to face Louis again, the crease still between his brows. His eyes just as pleading as his tone. "Just talk… Catch up."

"Why should I do that?" Louis asks quickly, gathering the albums he's collected so far in his hands, adding the _Nine Inch Nails_ album to the pile.

Harry breathes out an awkward laugh and bites his bottom lip. "S-so I can explain… Apologize…" Harry straightens up and steps a step closer, "I'll even let you ream me for what a dick I am."

Louis raises a brow, then rolls his eyes. Harry must be desperate, Louis knows how much Harry hated it when he yelled at him. For him to be using it as a bargaining chip means serious business. And Louis isn't gonna pass up laying into Harry for how badly he fucked up.

"Fine." Louis gives in, even though his brain is screaming at him not to. "But you're payin'…" Louis says and starts to walk to the counter at the front of the store so he can pay for his records. "Big musician like yourself must be able to afford some coffee for the guy you fucked over." Louis adds and smiles to the cashier when he reaches him, but also because he hears Harry's feet halt and a frustrated groan.

The front door of the store is open, it being a lovely summer day and all. And that's where Louis finds Harry after he pays, standing in the open doorframe, looking outside.

"Let's go." Is all Louis says, clutching his paper bag, when he gets to Harry.

Harry nods and they start to walk, side by side. Louis can't help but glance down at Harry's endless legs. Again his brain chastises him.

"Starbucks or Lula's and the park?" Harry asks.

"Lula's." Louis says, his legs have to work a little harder to keep up with Harry's strides. "Don't think Starbuck's would appreciate an old lovers spat." Louis says as they turn the corner, to the street Lula's is on. The park is across the street.

Harry doesn't say anything. Just keeps walking.

When they get to Lula's, there's a little bit of a line, three people in front of them. So they stand in line silently, Harry with his hands in his front pockets, looking at the floor, and Louis looking at his phone. There's only a text from Niall, and it's nothing that would be able to excuse Louis from this situation. Just a simple, _'Are we getting together tonight for drinks or not?'_ text.

Neither of them must have been paying attention, because one moment they are standing there quietly and the next, someone bumps into Harry from behind. It's nothing really, but its enough that it makes Harry bump into Louis. Harry's bare arm brushes against Louis' and Louis hates himself for closing his eyes and remembering a time when all he wanted was Harry's skin against his.

"Sorry." Harry mumbles and takes a couple steps forward as the person in front of them moves up to the counter.

"S'okay." Louis says, sliding his phone into his back pocket. He runs his hand along the skin Harry just brushed up against. It had only been the slightest of touches, but the skin on Louis' arm is tingling. Louis frowns. He doesn't want this.

"What'daya want?" Harry asks.

Louis shakes his head and looks up at Harry, "What?"

"What do you want to drink, Louis?" Harry asks, enunciating every word. Harry and the woman behind the counter are looking at Louis, waiting for his answer. He must have missed when the person in front of them walked away after getting their order.

"Oh shit, sorry…" Louis says, scratching his jaw. "I'll 'ave a medium Yorkshire Tea, please." Louis tells the woman and smiles at her.

"That all?" Harry asks, pulling out his wallet from his back pocket.

Louis quirks his lips to the side and bites the inside of his cheek while he looks at the baked goods behind the counter. "I'll also 'ave a red velvet cupcake, two blueberry scones and an everything bagel with cream cheese…" The woman and Harry both look at Louis with raised brows. "I'm hungry." He says and pats his stomach. Louis winks at the woman behind the counter, before he turns back to Harry. "Pay the lovely woman, Harold." Louis only called Harry that when he was either in deep shit, or as a term of endearment. It definitely wasn't the latter.

"I'll have a medium carmel latte." Harry says politely and pulls out 20 pounds, handing it to the woman, who places it in the register and gives Harry his change. She then goes about making their drink orders and gathering Louis' baked goods.

"You don't drink coffee anymore?" Harry asks while they wait.

"Nah…" Louis says, fiddling with his paper bag. "Never really liked it…"

"But we―" Harry starts to say, then cuts himself off.

"Only really drank it cause you loved it so much." Louis says quietly and sighs. He really needs a cigarette.

Harry furrows his forehead and gives Louis a questioning look, but doesn't say anything.

Louis can hear all the chattering around them, can hear laughter and the joy in peoples tones. He wishes he was talking to Harry that easily. Louis can remember when he thought Harry was the only person who could understand him. Now there's awkward silence between them as they shuffle back and forth on their feet as they wait for their order.

"Here ya go…" The girl behind the counter says, placing two drinks and the small bag of bakes good in front of them. "Sorry about the wait."

"It's fine, love. Have a great day." Louis says and smiles at the girl.

"You too!"

Louis grabs his drink and the bag and turns to walk away. He knows Harry and his legs can catch up to him easily.

He's outside the coffee shop, lighting a cigarette when Harry walks out the door and stops next to him, sipping on his latte.

"You smoke now?" Harry asks, his tone surprised.

"I do a lot now, that I didn't when we were together." Louis says, inhaling deeply, letting the smoke fill his lungs and calm him. He brings his hand up to his lips to cradle the cigarette between his index and middle finger as he blows the smoke out through his nose. Louis looks up at Harry quickly before taking off in the direction of the park across the street.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Harry asks, his voice coming from behind Louis, letting Louis know that he's following.

"Just that people change." Louis says, holding his bag of albums under his arm, his coffee and bag of baked goods in one hand and his cigarette in the other. Bringing it up to his mouth and inhaling, when he feels the need and flicking the ashes off the end when it's necessary. Louis doesn't want to tell Harry that it was Harry's leaving that made Louis pick up the bad habit.

"I guess so." Harry says softly, sounding slightly upset.

"I mean you would know that more then anyone… Right?" Louis asks, as he sits down on a bench, in the shade, the farthest away from people. He doesn't know how this conversation is going to go. He doesn't need strangers to hear him and Harry fighting if it happens.

Harry flops down heavily near Louis on the bench. "Is this just how it's gonna be, then? You, this mercilessly cold."

Louis places his albums and bag of baked goods in between them, so there can be some distance between them, even if it's slight. "Do you think you deserve anythin' else?" Louis asks, taking a sip of his tea, before placing it on the bench next to him and bringing his cigarette up to his lips again. The Nicotine is helping, it's not making him feel better, but it's not making him as restless.

"Guess not." Harry says, taking a sip of his latte, before looking out at the park in front of them. There's a lake and trees, there's even a playground on the other side of the lake, but right in front of them is pretty bare. A distance bench, in the shade of a big, lone tree. Louis wonders if the people who created the park put this bench so far away from everything else for awkward exes to get together like this.

There's a couple moments of silence, where Louis takes one last puff of his cigarette, before stubbing the butt out and flicking it out into the grass. He turns to Harry, who is now wringing his hands again. "So you gonna get to this explanation anytime soon?" Louis asks, blowing his smoke out in tiny little circles. They float away and dissipate in the air. "I'm expecting groveling."

"Lou…"Harry says, looking over at Louis.

"Don't…" Louis gives Harry a sharp look. "You don't get to call me that."

Harry just stares at Louis for a couple long seconds, looking hurt. Harry had always called Louis that nickname. Granted so did everyone else, but Harry knew Louis loved it when Harry called him by it. Well he used to… Now it was like twisting a knife through his heart.

Harry nods and wets his bottom lip with his tongue, "I… I guess the first thing I should say is that I'm sorry… Whether it's too later or not. I'm… I'm sorry…"

Louis says nothing.

Harry clears his throat and takes a sip of his latte. "I know I probably don't deserve…" Louis cocks and eyebrow, "I-I mean… I know I don't deserve the chance to explain myself…"

"Mhm." Louis agrees.

"But when I left…" Harry rubs his hands up and down his thighs quickly. "It really wasn't about you…"

"Oh, that's great." Louis scoffs, shaking his head in disbelief.

"N-no… No…" Harry starts, "I, erm―I just mean… I left because I needed to see if I could really make somethin' of myself. See if I actually 'ad a shot with my music…"

"And you 'ad to do that all the way across the fuckin' world?" Louis asks.

Harry breathes out heavily through his nose and rolls his lips into his mouth. "I told you that Nick…"

Louis glares at Harry, "Don't fuckin' say that assholes name!" Louis hated Nick. He was the one who took Harry away from Louis. With his lines of telling Harry he had the talent to be the next big singer/songwriter. Louis didn't disagree with Nick on that, he'd always told Harry he was gonna be famous someday. When they were young, Harry would fill notebooks with poetry and lyrics to songs he'd written. Harry had always said he wanted to share their love with the world through his music.

Harry gulps and nods, "Uhm… I-I told you before I left that… He 'ad been offered a job at a record label and that he wanted me to be his first artist."

This was nothing new to Louis, he remembers the brutal conversation he'd had with Harry the day before Harry left. He wishes he could forget.

"Ok… All of that doesn't really explain why you left me behind like I'd meant nothin' to you." Louis swallows the lump in his throat. He already feels his face heating up. He doesn't want to get upset. He sure as hell doesn't want to start crying at the park.

"Is that what you think?" Harry asks, sounding aghast.

"What the fuck else was I supposed to think, Harry!?" Louis asks, his voice rising a little. "You just left me… J-just left me to go start a new life in LA." Louis has to take a deep breath to calm himself. "We haven't fuckin' spoken in two years, Harry… Two years!" Louis runs a hand over his face, then through his fringe. "I… That doesn't really sound like somethin' one does to someone that means somethin' to them."

"It goes two ways, Louis…" Harry turns his body more, so his upper body is facing Louis. "You didn't text or call me…"

"You fuckin' broke my heart!" Louis yells at Harry, shocking them both a little bit. Louis reaches into his pocket and pulls out his pack of cigarettes and lighter. He hates that his hands are shaking slightly as he pulls a cigarette out and places it between his lips. He brings the lighter up to the end of the cigarette and cups his other hand around them so no breeze can blow out the flame.

Louis inhales deeply and tilts his head back as he puts his lighter and pack back in his pocket. He closes his eyes for a moment and wills himself to calm down. When he brings his head upright again and looks over at Harry, Harry has a worried look on his face. He blows the smoke out slowly, "I don't think I should 'ave been the first to call." Louis cradles the cigarette between his fingers and rolls it back and forth. "I wasn't the one that fucked up… I wasn't the one that left… I wasn't the one that ended us." Louis is proud of himself for how strong he sounds say that.

Harry is wringing his hands so tightly, Louis doesn't know how he hasn't pulled his fingers off yet. "C-can I have a drag?" Harry asks, nodding his chin towards Louis' cigarette.

Louis raises an eyebrow, "You smoke now?" Louis mocks Harry as he takes a deep pull and flicks the ashes off again, before handing the cigarette over to Harry.

Their fingers brush, and Louis is glad he can pass a sigh off as him just blowing out his smoke. Harry's fingers are so much longer then they were two years ago. Long and elegant, smooth but slightly rough from playing instruments. Harry had always said he wanted to learn as many instruments as he could. His callused fingers tell Louis that he'd been doing just that.

"Don't think there's a better time to start, then now." Harry says and brings the cigarette to his lips, inhaling cautiously.

"Yea, there is…" Louis mumbles and takes a sip of his cooled tea. It's bitter now that it's been sitting. And once again Louis doesn't tell Harry that he's the reason Louis started.

"Yea…" Harry agrees, nodding like he understands what Louis' saying without him saying it.

Louis watches as Harry gets more comfortable with inhaling, his pulls getting more and more deep with every intake.

"You must be a pretty shitty musician if you 'aven't even smoked before." Louis says, "Isn't that.. Like rocker 101."

Harry chuckles sadly, "Yea…"

They sit in silence as they pass the cigarette back and forth, trying to compose themselves, with the help of Nicotine. Louis hears his phone chirp and reaches back to pull it out of his back pocket. It's a text from Liam.

_Are you okay? I haven't heard from you all day._

Louis places his phone in his lap and runs both hands over his face. He feels awful, he hasn't thought of Liam once since he ran into Harry. He knows that's not good. He blows a heavy breath out of his mouth and tugs at a handful of hair as he runs his hand through the strands.

"Everythin' okay?" Harry asks quietly, as he takes the last pull of the cigarette and copies what Louis did earlier with the butt, stubbing it out and flicking it into the grass.

Louis slaps his hands against this thighs and stands up quickly. "No, Harold… Everythin' is fuckin' not okay…" He starts to pace back in forth in front of the bench.

Harry stands up as well and walks over to Louis, halting him in his repetitive steps. He moves to place a hand on Louis' arm, but Louis pushes Harry back hard.

"Don't…" Is all Louis says.

Harry holds up both hands in front of him, like a surrender. "Okay… Sorry." Harry brings his hands down and places them in his front pockets. "Who was that?" Harry asks, gesturing to Louis' phone, which Louis had left on the bench when he got up.

"None of your business." Louis says and crosses his arms over his chest. "You don't get to do this… You don't get to just know about my life now."

"I'm fuckin' trying, Lou―Louis…" Harry says, sounding agitated. "I said I'm sorry―"

"Like that just magically makes everythin' between us okay?!" Louis huffs out a sarcastic breath.

"What do you want to me to fucking say, Louis?" Harry says and takes two steps closer, his eyes hard. "I'm a fucking asshole! I fucked up… I know that. I've 'ad to live with not talkin' to you for two years too!"

"Don't put that on me!" Louis says, pointing his finger in Harry's face. "This is your doing!" Harry swats Louis' finger out of his face, and glares at Louis. "You left and started this great new life for yourself! And you didn't even ask me to go with you!" Louis raises his hands above his head, in a quick, exacerbated gesture. "So while you were off livin' your dream, I was here… Fuckin' wishing I'd never met you!" Louis pushes against Harry's chest hard before moving over to the tree, with his back against it, he slides down till he's seated on the grass.

Louis bring his knees up to his chest, places his bent elbows on his knees and drops his head into his hands. He's shaking. His mouth and throat feel dry. His head hurts. All in all, Louis pretty much feels like shit.

Between everything that's happened since running into Harry, and how he completely forgot about Liam… Louis just wishes a hole would open up in the ground and swallow him whole.

When he finally leans his head back against the tree and looks up at Harry, he feels like he just got kicked in the gut. Harry is still standing in the same place, his expression devastated and his eyes red. He's not crying, but he looks like he could. Louis shouldn't feel bad for saying what he had, but he does.

"Do… D-did you…" Harry's voice sounds crushed. He's not looking at Louis, but at the dirt at his feet. "Did you really mean that?"

"It's not fair!" Louis calls out louder then necessary, ignoring Harry's question. "You don't get to sound upset! You don't get to look like I just ruined your life!" Louis can feel tears threatening to spill and he wills them away.

"Why?!" Harry asks, broken voice sounding pissed now. "I'm not allowed to be broken hearted over what happened between us too? Just because I was the one that left?" Harry places his hand over his mouth and looks away for a minute. Looks out at the people scattered about in the park. "You have no idea how hard it was for me to leave…" Harry mumbles.

"Then why the fuck did you do it!?" Louis barks out viciously.

Harry doesn't say anything, and Louis wants to laugh. This is all a big fucking joke. Nothing is getting resolved. All thats happening is them yelling at each other in a public park and Louis feeling like the biggest dick, because he knows in his heart he's not over Harry. And he wants to be so badly.

"Because I was fuckin' scared! Okay…" Harry yells out, the loudest Louis' ever heard from him. And all of a sudden Harry is taking large steps towards Louis and dropping to his knees in front of him. "Is that okay with you, Mister Perfect?" Harry says through gritted teeth as he pushes Louis' arms away from his legs and places his hands on Louis' knees, pushing Louis' bent legs open so he can move closer, sitting on his haunches in between them.

"Harry…" Louis' panicked voice gasps out as he plants a hand firmly on Harry's chest, trying to push him back. Louis can feel Harry's chest heaving.

"I've never loved anyone else…" Harry says, his voice weak. "I've known you my whole fuckin' life… And I've never loved anyone else…" Harry pants in Louis' face. "Do you know how scary that is?" Louis' hand is doing nothing, Harry just pushes closer and knocks his head against Louis' temple, breathing harshly in his ear. "We were kids Lou…" Louis doesn't even have it in him to fight Harry about the name. He's shaking like a leaf and he wants nothing more then to throw his arms around Harry and forget about everything. But he knows it's not that easy. "Who expects to find their soulmate in the sandbox?" Louis' eyes slip shut, remembering the first time he saw Harry, like it was yesterday. "I… I got scared when we got serious. I'm not perfect… I had to know…" Harry gulps. Louis' ear is tingling with how closely Harry is breathing into it. "Had to know if you were it for me…"

Louis' eyes flash open, and he turns his head quickly. His body moving before his brain even realizes it. He brings his hands up and pushes hard against Harry's chest, hard enough to push Harry over, till he's laying on his back in the grass. "You fuckin' left me so you could… What? Fuck around?" Louis places his hands on the tree and uses them to help him stand up. "Fuck you, Harry!" Louis yells and walks over to the bench, prepared to gather his albums and leave. He can't believe Harry. This whole time, he thought it was about Harry's music, and the whole time it was because Harry wanted to get away from him.

"No, Louis… Wait!" Louis feels Harry's hand on his arm, pulling him to turn around. And when he does, he brings his hand up. A sharp slap echoes in his ears as he watches the force of his hand against Harry's cheek, turn Harry's head. They're both breathing heavily and tears are now streaming down Louis' face. He held out as long as he could.

"You asked earlier if I meant it when I said I wished I'd never met you…" Louis spits out at Harry. "I'm pretty sure you have your answer." Louis says and turns, he picks up his albums, pockets his phone and moves to walk away.

He barely walks two steps before Harry is barreling into him and stopping Louis with his hands. Harry's eyes are wide and pleading as he moves around to stand in front of Louis, his hands on either side of Louis' neck, keeping him looking at Harry. "Please wait, Louis. You're jumping to conclusions… Just let me finish, yea? Please?" Harry begs. He takes Louis' silences as an okay to continue. "I'm so sorry if you think I left because I didn't want you. That couldn't be further from the truth. I left because I wanted to try and make somethin' of myself and start a life for myself that you'd be proud of. I went to LA to grow and work on music that you inspired me to make." Louis' head is swimming. Harry words penetrating his brain and making it hard for him to breath. "I'm so fuckin' sorry I didn't ask you to come with me. I wanted to so bad. I just knew how excited you were about your football scholarship. I couldn't bare the thought of you resentin' me for askin' you to pass it up."

Louis' brain works a mile a minute as he takes in everything Harry says. It all sounds so logical. But why couldn't Harry have just talked to him about this then. Why'd he have to make Louis feel like he was getting left and dumped? Everything could have been so different.

"That wasn't your decision, Harry…" Louis finally pipes up. "That was mine to make… My decision." Louis swallows and tries to sucks in as much air to his lungs as he can. "We were supposed to be equals and you just decided without me… Thinkin' what? That it would be easier." Louis snorts out a broken laugh. "Look at us now Harry."

"I―" Harry is cut off when Louis hears his ringtone for Liam, Drake's _Take Care_. He pushes back from Harry quickly, runs his hands over his face, and clears his throat, trying to get rid of the sobs threatening to still from his lips. He sprints over to the bench, where he left his cold tea and takes a big gulp, hoping the liquid will help.

He looks over to Harry, who is still standing a couple feet away, his brows furrowed. "Please… Don't say anythin'." Louis says, and turns around, giving his back to Harry.

He pulls out his phone and clears his throat one last time before hitting the accept button on his screen, "Hey you…" Louis tries to make his voice cheerful, when he brings the phone to his ear to talk to Liam.

"Hey yourself…" He hears Liam's sweet tone and he closes his eyes. Trying to let Liam's voice relax him. "I was startin' to get worried. Everythin' okay?"

"Oh, yea… I just got hung up at the record store. You know how I am in that place."

"That I do." Liam laughs and Louis smiles, "What did ya end up gettin'?"

"A couple albums…" Louis says, his eyes opening and focusing on the lake. His legs start to move and he begins to pace in front of the bench again. He leans over towards the bench and places the bag of albums on it, so he doesn't have to hold it while he talks. "But I promise I'll let you listen to 'em lat'ah."

"Yea, alright. That sounds great." Liam says. Louis can hear shuffling on Liam's end, and knows the other man is probably getting ready to go to sleep. Liam yawns and that confirms it for Louis. "Niall texted me, lookin' for ya. Are you guys comin' to the club tonight?"

"I…" Louis looks over at Harry quickly, his head is down and his hand is up to his mouth, plucking at his bottom lip. But Louis can tell he's listening to every word. "I dunno yet. I still have to get in touch with Niall. I wanted to go to the book store first. Need to replace that copy of The Great Gatsby that Zayn stole from me. I know I'll never be gettin' it back. You know Zayn's in that decadence phase." Louis laughs.

"I know, the other day when we went shoppin' I saw 'im makin' heart eyes at a Cartier watch…" Liam chuckles and the sound puts Louis more at ease. So at ease, that Louis doesn't notice Harry walk up behind him and pull his pack of cigarettes out of his back pocket. He turns around quickly and watches Harry with narrowed eyes. Harry just stares at him as he opens the pack, pulls a cigarette and the lighter out. "I told 'im, he'd 'ave to sell a fuck ton of his paintings first, before he could even afford half the watch." Harry licks his lips before placing the tip of the cigarette in his mouth, cocking his head when he brings the lighter up to light the end.

"I'm sure that went over real well, Li."

Harry raises his brow and inhales deeply as he pockets Louis' pack. His long and beautiful fingers come up to gather the cigarette. They just stand there watching each other.

"I had to buy 'im Ice Cream." Liam laughs, which makes Louis laugh… Which makes Harry frown.

"Why don't you ever buy me any?" Louis asks, his tone pouty. He can tell Harry is making his own assumptions up in his head of who Louis' on the phone with. If it makes him a bad person for wanting Harry to be jealous, then so be it. He knows what his relationship with Liam is like. Harry doesn't though.

"How about we go get some tomorrow?" Liam asks.

"Yes, please." Louis says and smiles. "What time are you spinnin' tonight?"

"Ten to three." Liam yawns. "I'm in bed now."

"Yea, I can tell…" Louis says. "Can hear the sheets." At that Harry's nostrils flare and his free hand makes a fist next to his thigh. Louis laughs.

"Mmm. It's comfy… The sheets are nice and cold."

"I love that." Louis bites his lip and watches Harry take a long pull of the cigarette and look away, smoke circles around Harry as he blows it out through his mouth. He flicks the ashes off the end of the cigarette before putting it back in his mouth.

"Yea, me too."

"Listen, why don't I let you go to bed…" Louis starts, Harry's still looking away. "I'll call Niall lat'ah and see what he wants to do tonight and I'll try and text you before your shift and let you know if we're comin' or not."

"Alright, sounds good. Bye, Lou." Liam sounds like he's seconds away from passing out.

"Sleep tight, Li." Louis smiles and pulls the phone away from his ear, hitting the end button.

Louis stands there watching Harry, who has yet to look back over at him. Louis brings his hand down and slaps his phone against the outside of his thigh a couple times as he thinks of what to say to Harry.

"That your boyfriend?" Harry asks, his tone sounding like he doesn't want to know the answer.

Louis sighs out through his nose as he thinks of how to explain Liam. "Not in so many words…"

Harry finally looks over, a confused look written on his face, "What the hell does that mean?"

Louis chuckles, pockets his phone, and walks over to Harry, when he's right in front of Harry, he reaches up and plucks the cigarette from between Harry's lips and brings it down to his own. Sucking in the last couple of pulls before the cigarette is finished. "It's complicated." Is all Louis says. He walks back over to the bench, sits down on it and drops the cigarette butt at his feet, stubbing it out with the tip of his Vans.

"So un-complicate it." Harry says and walks up to Louis, standing right in front of him.

Louis sighs and runs a hand over his face and down his jaw, "Look, I'm gettin' pretty hungry, and I could really use a drink… Can we just go somewhere an--"

"Let's go back to my place." Harry cuts in quickly and bites his bottom lip.

"What?" Louis asks and looks at Harry with sharp eyes, his forehead furrowed.

"It's like ten minutes from here… I left my car outside the record store. We just 'ave to walk back to it." Harry says, a small smile on his face.

"No, no, no… You live in London again?" Louis looks up at Harry like he's crazy. That's a big something to not mention. This whole time Louis has been trying to be strong, trying to hold himself together, because he figured that Harry is just visiting from LA. But he's back... He's back in London, and as much as Louis hates it, Harry still has his heart. What that means for them, Louis doesn't know. But he's known Harry his whole life, and been in love with him just as long. Even though Harry hurt Louis, when he left, Louis can't just forget their history. Can't just stop the way he feels when Harry gazes into his eyes. And he sure as hell can't forget what Harry had admitted earlier.

"Yea, just moved in two days ago."

"What―Why are you back? What happened to LA?" Louis asks. When Harry had left, Louis cut all ties with him, un-friending him on Facebook, un-following him on Twitter, he refused to Google Harry and see if anything popped up. He even tried to avoid music channels on TV for fear of hearing Harry's name one day. And instead of listening to the radio, Louis always plugged his phone into his car, listening to the hundreds of songs he had on it.

"Well how 'bout we go to my place, I'll make us something to eat, we can drink a couple beers… Aaaaaaand we can talk about it…" Harry looks down at his watch, then back at Louis. "I actually think there's a ManU game on today at three."

Louis narrows his eyes at Harry. That was a low blow, Louis could never pass up a Manchester United match, and Harry knew that.

Louis just sits there, kicking his feet back and forth, looking at how different in size his and Harry's feet are. He doesn't know what to do. His mind is yelling at him, _'Don't you dare fucking go to his flat you pathetic asshole! You won't last twenty minutes alone with him!'_ But his heart and gut are saying, _'Why are you even pretending to think about this you pathetic asshole! You already know you're gonna go with him.'_

But Louis doesn't mind the idea of making Harry wait, so he sighs and rubs the back of his neck. He waits a good two minutes before finally caving, "Fine."

Harry's face breaks out into a huge smile, making his dimples appear, but before he can say anything, Louis adds, "But I'm tellin' you right now, Harry… We are not 'avin' sex."

Harry cocks an eyebrow and smiles widely.

"I'm serious, Harold." Louis says, standing up and grabbing his bag of albums again. He moves past Harry and starts to walk, but when he doesn't hear Harry following, he turns back around. "What?"

"Don't you want that?" Harry asks, pointing at the bag of baked goods still sitting on the bench.

"No."

"Then why'd you say you wanted all that shit?" Harry asks, cocking his head to the side.

"Just wanted to make you buy it." Is all Louis says and turns to walk in the direction he knows he has to go back to.

"Real mature, Lou." Harry says. Louis turns his head and looks back at Harry with a pointed look. He doesn't say anything though.

"Sorry." Harry apologizes, and Louis can see he's carrying the bag of baked goods in his hand, he's also grabbed both of their empty cups. Louis smiles as he turns to face in front of him. "So you gonna tell me about your 'not in so many words' boyfriend?" Harry asks, catching up to Louis quickly, so they walk side by side.

Louis groans, he so doesn't want to have this conversation. "Do I have a choice?"

"No." Harry chuckles. Louis glances over and sees Harry waiting in expectation. He has a smile on his face, but his eyes are sharp. Like he needs to know the answers to his questions.

Louis groans again. "I don't even know where to begin… Just―" Louis rubs a hand over his face, "Just ask me what you wanna fuckin' know."

"What's his name?" Harry asks right away as the two of them walk passed the lake.

"Liam."

"When did you two meet?"

"A year and a half ago." Louis' legs stop walking when he sees Harry halt mid walk. "What?"

Harry's eyes are narrowed, "You only waited half a year before you started seein' someone else?" Harry's tone was accusing.

This is why Louis didn't want to have this conversation. He knew Harry was gonna act like this. Harry had always been very possessive. Louis had found it hot in the past, but now, when Harry doesn't know the whole story, it's frustrating.

Louis sighs and steps closer to Harry. He hates talking about the period of time after Harry left and before he met Liam. It was dark and filled with pain. Louis also doesn't remember a lot from that time in between, because he went out, fucked around, drank and did drugs almost every night. How he got through that semester of Uni, Louis'll never know.

"Harry… After you left was the―It was a really dark time for me. I… I did a lot of shit I wish I hadn't…" His gaze turns away from Harry, looks at the glass below his feet. "I'd just lost my best friend and the only person I've ever―" Louis stops and takes a deep breath, before starting again, changing his path of conversation, "I barely spoke to mom and the girls for months. I didn't want to get to know any of the people at school… Didn't want to form friendships… Everyone always leaves…" He looks back up at Harry, who's facial expression is replaced with regret. "For six month, it was pretty shitty… The worse." Louis swallows the lump in his throat. "And then I met Liam." Louis smiles, thinking about everything Liam, and even Zayn, has done for him.

Harry licks his lips and looks down, "Do you love him?" Harry cuts in quickly, Louis can tell he's getting the question out of the way. He can see the pain in Harry's eyes.

"Yes." Louis doesn't lie.

Harry looks back up, his eyes locking onto Louis', searching for the truth. Louis' knows he's found it when he rolls his lips into his mouth and starts nodding his head.

"But…" Louis starts. "It's not that simple…" Explaining his relationship with Liam is difficult. Not a lot of people know about it, know the whole truth. Most people won't understand… Or approve. Not that Louis gives a shit what other people thought. "He's not really my boyfriend. I-I mean he is… But he's not… Not completely."

Harry's forehead creases, "What the fuck? I don't understand. Just tell me, Louis."

Louis runs a hand through his hair and starts walking again. He's not stopping if Harry doesn't follow this time. "We have an open relationship." Louis murmurs.

Louis feels Harry pull on his shirt, he turns to see Harry's shocked expression. "Sorry, what was that?"

"You heard me." Louis pushes Harry back so he's not pulling on his shirt anymore, and continues walking. He looks back, Harry is following him, but slowly.

"You're serious." Louis hears Harry ask.

"Yea."

They pass people in the park, they cross the road, they walk around the corner and make it back to the record store in complete silence. Louis knows Harry's behind him, he can feel him more then hear him. He sees Harry throw away their empty cups in the trashcan by the curb, out of his peripheral vision.

Louis stops and is about to turn and ask Harry where his car is, when Harry just walks up to a 1967 Chevy Impala. It's sleek and painted all black, with a red stripe going along the side of the car. Harry's hands fumble in his tight jeans for a moment and when he brings his hand back out, Louis can hear the faint jingle of keys. Louis watches Harry unlock the passenger door and open it.

"This…" Louis walks closer. "This is your car?"

"Yea."

And that's all that's said. Louis sighs, but thanks Harry for holding the door open for him. Harry had always been courteous. Always went above and beyond to please. Always wanted to make others happy. _'Except for when he left'_ , Louis can't help his mind from thinking.

Louis slides into the gorgeous classic American muscle car, places his bag of albums on the seat and reaches over to unlock Harry's lock. He doesn't even notice he's done it until Harry slides in next to him, throws the bag of baked goods on the seat and thanks him, with a small smile on his face.

The inside of the car is sexy as hell. The front seat is all one seat, there's no console in the middle. The seats are leather, mostly black, with red stripes going down them. The back seat is huge, well huge for a back seat. It just looks like there's a lot of room. Louis tries not to look back there, he doesn't want to get any ideas.

Harry puts the keys in the ignition, starts the car and The Script's _'We Cry'_ blares through the speakers. Harry quickly moves to turn the sound down, so it's not at a deafening volume. He's got his iPod playing through the radio, hooked up with an aux cord.

"You can change it if you want." Harry says as he puts his hand on the stick shift and places it into drive. Louis doesn't say anything or move to change it. Harry knows how much Louis loves The Script. Louis remembers The Script concert they went to together. It had been the first date they went on. After years of pining. It had been an amazing night.

Louis is shaken out of his thoughts when Harry drives away from the curb and into the traffic.

"So you were serious back there?" Harry asks, after a couple moments pass of them just listening to the music.

"About Liam?" Louis turns his head towards Harry and asks.

"Yea." Harry's hands tighten on the steering wheel.

"Yea." Louis answers back.

Harry cracks his fingers, before rolling down the windows. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out Louis' pack of cigarettes. Pulling one out for himself and lighting it, throwing the pack and lighter on the seat when he's done with them.

"So glad I could help you start the habit." Louis says as he watches Harry's chest expand as he inhales deeply.

Harry leaves the cigarette in his mouth as he places both hands on the wheel and turns a corner. "I just never would 'ave takin' you for doin' somethin' like that."

Louis doesn't ever need to ask Harry what he's talking about. He just turns his head to look out the window, "Yea, well… You kind of fucked me up."

 _'We Cry'_ ends and Louis hears Harry sigh loudly. The next song comes on and Louis knows what it is right away. The sounds of The Verve's _'Bitter Sweet Symphony'_ fills the car and Louis relaxes immensely. It's so funny how music can alter moods and change how you feel. This song has always made Louis feel better… Calmer.

"Sorry…" Louis says, turning his head to see Harry flicking the end of the cigarette out the window, so the ash falls off. "I… Know you're sorry… I know―I believe you. I just…" Louis watches Harry bring the cigarette back up to his lips and inhale. "It's gonna take me a lit'le while to trust you again."

Harry stops at a red light and nods lightly before turning and smiling at Louis. "I've got all the time in the world." He says and holds out the cigarette for Louis to take.

Louis takes the cigarette and places it between his lips. He doesn't know how to feel about what Harry just said. What did he mean? Is he back in London for good? What happened with his music? What's going to happen between them? Louis wishes his could see his future. His gut wretches as Harry takes off when the light turns green, his insides feel like something is crawling around and trying to get out.

"So how does it work?" Harry asks.

"How does what work?" Louis asks back, confused.

"How does whatever you 'ave with… Liam work?" Harry asks, clearing his throat.

"Oh, uh, it's pretty casual actually." Louis starts. "He's just basically my best friend…" Harry's hands tighten on the steering wheel again, "Who I 'appen to 'ave amazin' sex with." Louis is jolted forward a bit when Harry's foot slams on the break, causing the car to come to a halt. The car behind Harry honks its horn. "Harry! What the fuck are you doin'?" Louis slaps Harry's arm. Harry shakes his head and takes his foot off the break, pressing on the gas, and making the car move forward again. "You could 'ave gotten us in an accident, asshole!"

Harry runs a hand through his hair and turns the corner, "Sorry." He mumbles.

Louis takes a deep and long inhale of the cigarette and shakes his head at Harry. "Don't act like this, Harry." Louis flicks the ash off the end of the cigarette, then leans his forearm on the window, exhaling slowly. "Don't act like you've been an innocent bystander these two years… You've been in LA for fucks sake. Don't even pretend nothin' happened."

"I didn't fuckin' fall in love with anyone." Harry says, glancing over at Louis with narrowed eyes.

Louis groans and lets his head fall back against the seat. "It's not like―I don't…" Louis runs a hand over his face, "It's a different kind of love."

"Oh, don't give me that shit, Louis!" Harry says, stopping at another red light.

"It's true. The love I 'ave for Liam is a love all on its own." Louis hasn't a clue how to explain his relationship with Liam, without Harry getting upset. "Just like the love I 'ave for Niall is different. The love I 'ave for the boys is different then the love I 'ave for mum and the girls. Do you understand?" Louis asks, hoping Harry is getting what he's trying to say. "The love I 'ave for Liam can't be compared to the love I had for you… It's just―"

"Had?" Harry asks, and slams his foot on the gas when the light turns green, the tired screeching slightly.

"Harry, you just came back after two fuckin' years… A-after fuckin' me up a bit…" Louis inhales the last pull of the cigarette and exhales it quickly through his nose, throwing the butt out the window. "Sorry, if I don't quite know how I feel about it."

Harry nods his head in acceptance, "So tell me about 'im?" He asks his a low voice.

"Do you honestly want to know?" I chuckle, knowing he doesn't.

"Yea..." Harry says, looking over at me. "Wanna make sure he's treatin' you right."

"Why, it's not like you cared when you left…" Louis says, wincing as soon as the words are out of his mouth. Louis looks over and Harry is biting his lips. He can still see Harry cringing. "Fuck, I… I'm sorry, Harry…" Louis touches Harry's arm in a quick reassuring gesture. He doesn't trust himself to touch Harry more then necessary. "I-it just came out… I 'ave a lot of pent up anger about everythin' that 'appened."

"I know… I deserve it." Harry murmurs.

"Yea, well, If you really wanna know… Liam is great. I met 'im at the club he works at. He's a DJ."

"I figured. I heard you ask 'im when he's spinnin' tonight." Harry pulls into a small parking lot, next to a five story brick building. Louis hadn't really been paying attention before, even when he was looking out the window. When he looks out the window at his surrounding, he doesn't see anything he knows. He's in a part of London he's never been to before.

"Yea, he's fuckin' amazin'." Louis says as Harry pulls into a parking spot labeled 'five'. Harry puts the car in park, pulls the keys from the ignition, grabs the bag of baked goods and Louis' cigarettes. Louis grabs his albums and they climb out of the car together. They both lock their doors and slam the doors shut one right after the other.

"You said that." Harry sighs, and Louis knows Harry's referring to when Louis said Liam is amazing in bed.

Harry starts walking towards the front of the building and Louis follows. "How does Niall like 'im?"

Niall had moved to London with his family, from Ireland, when he was fourteen. Harry and Louis quickly adopted him, and he became like a brother to them. The three of them were inseparable. Even when Louis and Harry had gotten together, Niall was there telling them how thankful he was for them finally realizing they were in love with each other.

And Niall was always chasing skirts, so he never minded how often Harry and Louis needed alone time. But when Harry left, Louis pushed Niall away. He told Niall he didn't want to be around him anymore, because Louis knew Niall was just gonna leave him too. But Louis finally realized that Niall wasn't Harry. Niall came to Louis' dorm everyday at Uni, knocked on the door, even when Louis told him to fuck off.

Niall is patient man though. He had told Louis he loved him, that he knew Louis needed space, and that he'd always be here for him. That made it worse somedays, cause those were the words Louis wanted to hear from Harry… But Harry was gone.

Louis knew Niall kept in touch with Harry, and when Louis finally caved and couldn't be without Niall anymore, that lasted two weeks, Louis had told Niall he didn't want to know anything about Harry. Not a single thing. And he didn't want Niall telling Harry anything about him. Not a single thing.

Louis has no idea if Niall even knows that Harry's back. Knowing Niall he probably does though, he's just the type of guy everyone tells everything to. Especially if Harry has moved back… Harry had to have told Niall that.

"Niall loves 'im. They get on really well. He even gets on well with Zayn." Louis follows Harry to the front door of the building. Harry uses a key from his keyring to unlock the door. "Niall's really the only person who understand the whole situation with Liam and approves."

There isn't really much of a lobby, there are a couple of doors, the stairs and an elevator. They walk up to the elevator and Harry presses the up button. "What'daya mean approves? What's there to approve of? And who's Zayn?"

The elevator doors glide open and Louis steps in. Harry just stands there with his hand on one of the doors, so they don't close, and waits for Louis to answer.

Louis licks his lips and sighs. This is what he didn't want to talk about. He doesn't know how Harry is gonna react. Louis knew everything about the boy and the young man Harry used to be, but this man in front of him… Louis doesn't know much about.

"Well?" Harry asks.

"Um… Zayn's― Well, i-its kind of a funny story…" Louis is fumbling with his words. He brings a hand up, and rubs at his eyes, they feel irritated. When he opens them, Harry is still waiting, looking at him expectantly. "Zayn is Liam's boyfriend…"

"What?" Harry asks, and "It's not like it sounds!" Louis says at the same time.

"What'daya fuckin' mean, it's not like it sounds…" Harry eyes are wide, as he steps into the elevator. The doors close and a ding sounds off.

"E-everyone knows about each other." Louis says in a rush. "It's not like we're foolin' around behind anyone's back." Louis knows how awful this must sound. But it's what's been keeping Louis sane the past year and a half.

"Wait… You sleep with both of them?!" Harry asks, his octave raising.

"N-no, no… Well, not usually. I mean―" Louis tries to defend himself, and the confession slips out.

"Are you serious?" Harry says, moving closer, stepping into Louis' personal space. "You fuck around with two guys who are datin' each other?"

"No!" Louis calls out and pushes Harry back. Since the elevator is just at a stand still and not moving, it's getting rather stuffy and Louis can feel himself starting to sweat. "It not like that… It's not like that at all." Louis presses his back against the wall. "Can you press your floor number? I 'ave to get out of here, it's gettin' really hot."

Harry steps back and presses the 'five' button on the panel. He doesn't take his eyes off Louis though. "So tell me what the fuck it's like then, Louis." Harry says and walks back over to Louis, as the elevator starts to ascend.

Louis groans and kicks his foot against the wall of the elevator. "When I met Liam… H-he was already datin' Zayn. They're like completely in love. It was unbearable to watch them together in the beginning. I never wanted to be around both of them at first. I-it was too―Just made me feel worse." Louis watches as the numbers above the elevator quickly rise. "On a particularly shitty night for me… Niall was off with some bird and I was gettin' completely hammered, alone in the dorm… I called Liam and asked 'im to come over." The elevator reaches the fifth floor and comes to a stop, a ding sounding off as the doors open.

Louis moves to get off, but Harry grabs his wrist and pushes him against one of the doors, so it can't close. "Tell me…" Harry says, his eyes pleading.

Louis breathes in big gulps of the cool air on Harry's floor. There's just a little landing, then Harry's door. Louis is still very aware of Harry's hand holding his wrist tightly. He makes a fist, so as not to tempt himself to lace his fingers through Harry's. "W-we drank the rest of the night. We were already good friends by that time. He's so easy to be around. He's so relaxing. It… It just 'append."

Harry's hold on Louis' wrist tightens.

"I don't even really remember most of the rest of that night… Our first time t-together." Louis swallows loudly, "But of course, we both felt awful about it after. We didn't talk for a couple days… When I finally got the nerve to go see him, Zayn answered the door. They live together. I told Zayn how sorry I was and that it wouldn't 'appen again." Louis looks out at the landing and thinks how much he'd actually like to be in Harry's flat right now. It feels awkward and tense out on the landing.

"What did he say?" Harry asks, his voice sounds dry.

"He told me that Liam 'ad told 'im about everythin'… Th-they don't 'ave secrets. Zayn already knew about you and I. Niall told them, s-so I wouldn't 'ave to…" Louis is so thankful for Niall. He is always there. "And he said he could see me and Liam getting closer. How well we got on. H-he said he trusted us…" Louis closes his eyes, "If we wanted to date…" Louis whispers.

There's a long moment of silence. Louis opens his eyes and looks over at Harry when he feels Harry's hand let go of his wrist. Harry looks bewildered and he's got a frown on his face. "Why would he do that?"

"I'm honestly not sure. He said he talked to Niall, who told 'im things about you. So I'm sure Niall told 'im things you said." Louis shrugs. "So maybe somethin' reassured him. Maybe he saw how much I just needed someone there. I dunno… You'd 'ave to ask 'im that yourself. Liam and I were total'y shocked when he told us we could date." Louis pushes off the wall and steps out onto the landing completely. "But like I told you, it turned out to be more like best friends who occasionally sleep together."

Harry steps away from the elevator doorway as well, the doors close immediately, the bell dings again. Harry's keys jingling in his hands as he looks for the right one. There's only one door, so every floor must be just one flat.

"But you fuck Zayn too." Harry says, moving over to the door and placing his key in the top lock. He turns the lock, takes the key out and places it in the doorknob lock, unlocks it, takes his key out, but doesn't open the door. Harry just stands there, with his hand on the doorknob and looks over at Louis.

Louis rolls his eyes and sighs, "Yea, every once in awhile the three of us sleep together…But I can count the number of times on one hand."

Harry just rolls his lips into his mouth, he doesn't say anything, he just hums. He turns the doorknob and pushes the door open. He walks through the doorframe and Louis follows. Harry shuts the door and locks it once they are both inside.

The first thing that hits Louis is the cool and refreshing air. Harry must have the air conditioning on. As Louis walks further into the flat, he notices how large it it. Right when you walk in the front door is the main room, living room, whatever you want to call it. The room is a huge open space, white walls with hardwood floors. There's a rather large widescreen TV on the wall, with a big entertainment system underneath, which has speakers, DVD's and gaming systems. There's a huge black leather couch, opposite the TV, with a long matching rectangular ottoman. Glass side tables stand on either side of the couch, with books and magazines on them. There are lamps hanging from the ceiling right above both side tables. There are wire cords attached to a metal ring, and then from the ring, glass jars with lightbulbs inside them hang from different leveled cords.

On the wall behind the couch is an array of different string instruments on display. There is a Banjo, a Violin, two Guitars, a Mandolin, a Sitar and a Ukulele.

"Can you play all of these?" Louis nods his chin at the display.

Harry smiles, then cringes slightly, "All but the Sitar. It's a bitch to get a hang of."

Louis chuckles and Harry smiles at him. It's like since stepping into Harry's flat the air between them is different. Lighter somehow, even though now they're alone, and anything can happen. Louis' starting to think coming here was a bad idea.

"So as you can see, this is the livin' room…" Harry walks over to one of the couch side tables and pulls his phone, wallet, keys and Louis' pack of cigarettes from his pockets, dropping them on said table.

"I thought you just moved in?" Louis asks, placing his bag of albums on the ottoman. Harry's flat looks pretty settled into. There aren't boxes everywhere, everything seems in order and the place feels homey.

"Well technically I've had the place for 3 months…" Harry says as he unzips his boots and throws them in the corner by the door, where a couple other pairs of shoes are.

Louis raises his eyebrows at that.

"But I only just moved in myself." Harry starts walking towards a large doorway and gestures for Louis to follow. "I 'ad people unpack the basics and set the furniture and shit up…"

"You really must be doing well…" Louis says as he follows Harry into a gorgeous, state of the art kitchen. Everything is sleek and surfaces are shiny. The kitchen has everything one could need and more, there's even a mini-bar next to the doorway. There's an island in the middle of the room, and Louis walks over to it and sits on one of the stools. Harry throws the bag of baked goods onto the counter. Louis doesn't know why Harry won't just throw it away.

There is a big kitchen table off to the side, but Louis finds he likes the island. Like in the living room, there are hanging lights above the island, but instead of glass jars, the lightbulbs sit in hanging upside-down tea cups, that are lined up in a row. Louis smiles at them. "The whole musician thing must be goin' well." Louis says and watches Harry move to the refrigerator.

Harry opens the fridge and grabs two beers, "I can't complain…" He says and walks up to Louis, handing him a beer, after twisting both tops off. "The only thing that sucked about it was bein' away from you." Harry says, takes a long swig of his beer, places it on the counter before walking back over to the fridge. "What are you in the mood for?" Harry asks, bends over and starts rummaging through the contents of the fridge.

Louis just sits there in silence, half mulling over what Harry had just said and half cause his ass looks really good bent over like it is. How is it so easy for Harry to just say shit like that to Louis. Doesn't he know what it's doing to Louis. How confused it's making him. Harry's ass isn't helping. Louis just stares at it and if that wasn't bad enough, he must have spaced off, cause the next time he focuses, Harry is turned around and Louis is staring at his crotch and that's even worse.

Louis shakes his head, berating himself in his head. "What?" Louis asks louder then necessary.

Harry's eyes widen comically and he chuckles, "I said what do you want to eat."

"Oh…" Louis frowns, thinking. "I don't care." Is all he finally says.

Harry mock groans and moves over to a cabinet, "You're no help." He says as he starts rummaging through that. "Hmm. How about…" Harry starts pulling items from the cabinet, and once again Louis zones out. Harry's reaching for whatever he's looking for and his shirt is riding up, causing a decent amount of his skin to show in between his shirt and jeans. Louis looks away quickly and moves to bring the beer to his lips. He takes a large gulp of the amber liquid and yells at himself in his head, when he puts the bottle back down and goes right back to looking at Harry. "Chicken Alfredo?" Harry finally finishes his sentence.

"Hmm? Yea, sure… Whatever." Louis rushes to stand up and Harry looks over when the stool screeches against the hardwood floor. "Where's your loo?"

"You okay?" Harry asks, moving away from the counter.

Louis just nods and holds up his hands. Harry coming over to him is not the best idea right now.

Harry frowns, but stays put. "The first door when you walk into the hallway."

Louis manages a small smile and turns to walk out of the room, his eyes lock onto the bar, filled with every liquor imaginable, on his way out. When he gets back out into the living room he waits till he hears Harry moving around again. He slowly peeks back into the kitchen and sees Harry squatting down to get pans, his back to Louis. Louis hears the clicking of pans and quickly grabs the closest bottle of liquor.

He rushes to the bathroom and quietly slams the door. It's still daylight out so turning on lights is unnecessary. Louis places the liquor bottle on the counter and turns on the cold water faucet. He runs his hands under the water, then cups the water in his hands and brings it to his face.

What the hell is he doing? Why did he agree to come here. Harry isn't even doing anything and Louis wants to ravish him till neither of them can breath. This isn't how it's suppose to be. How can he feel like this when he is still so angry at Harry.

Louis splashes water over his face and neck a couple of times, not caring that he got his shirt a little wet, before turning off the faucet and drying his hands.

He grabs the liquor bottle, which happens to be Tequila, and moves over to the toilet. Louis closes the lid and sits down on it, he just looks at the bottle. Is this what his life has come to? Him sitting alone in the bathroom drinking, so he can get through spending a couple hours with his ex. Who happens to have broken his heart… Who also happens to be the love of his life.

Louis twists off the cap and brings the bottle to his lips. The clear liquor slides down his throat easily. He welcomes the burn as it distracts him from his thoughts for a minute. After a shot sip, Louis pulls the bottle away.

Everything that has been said and has happened today between Louis and Harry soars around in Louis' head. He understand's why Harry left now, but he's still pissed that Harry didn't give him the decision to go with him. It's not like football worked out for him anyway. He could have been with Harry this whole time. Instead Louis fucked up repeatedly after Harry left and got kicked off the team, making him lose his scholarship.

Louis doesn't regret it really. He loves what he does now. He just regrets fighting with his mom for those couple of months. It had been fucking awful. Once again Louis is so thankful for his friends, he doesn't know what he would have done without Liam, Zayn and especially Niall.

Niall… He's always there to help. Louis pulls out his phone and sends a quick text to Niall. _'I am so fucked.'_ Is all he sends.

Louis takes another large gulp of Tequila and stands up. He screws the cap back on the bottle and places it and his phone on the sink counter, lifts the toilet seat lids and unzips his jeans.

While he relieves himself, Louis thinks about what his life could have been like if he'd have gone with Harry to LA. Obviously Harry is doing well. He could have been there to see it. Could have been there to celebrate and go through everything with Harry. That's what they had always said when they were younger. Everything together… Two against the world.

Louis is pulled from his thoughts when a soft knocks sounds through the bathroom. "Shit." He whispers, shakes his dick and puts himself back in his briefs and jeans.

Louis flushes the toilet, "Just washin' my 'ands… Be right out." Louis has no idea how long he's been in the bathroom. He moves over to the sink and washes his hands again. Wiping them on his jeans to dry them. He looks at himself in the mirror, runs a hair through his hair and turns to open the door.

Harry is leaning against the opposite wall, hands behind him, nestled between the wall and his ass. "Everythin' okay?" He asks, a worried look on his face. "Thought you might 'ave climbed out a window." Harry tries to lighten the mood.

Louis looks over his shoulder to the windows on either side of the shower. "I don't think I'd be able to fit." Louis chuckles and walks into the hallway, "Not to mention we're on the fifth floor." He starts to walk back in the direction of the kitchen and is greeted with the mouth watering smell of the food Harry's cooking.

"Oh my god, that smells so good, Harry." Louis says when they reach the kitchen. He walks over to the stove and sees chicken cooking, pasta boiling, and sauce heating up.

Harry walks right up behind him and looks over his shoulder. "You wanna do somethin'?" He asks.

Louis' body tenses when he feels Harry's front brush against his back. "Huh?" Louis asks, turning his head, his and Harry's nose just inches from each other. Louis moves away slightly, but Harry's hand keeps him in place.

"Do you wanna help? You wanna stir the sauce?" Harry asks and turns Louis' body back towards the stove, handing him a large wooden spoon.

"Oh…" Louis clears his throat and breathes easier. "N-no… Not unless you want it ruined." Louis chuckles and slides away from the stove, pressing the spoon firmly in Harry's hand.

"Still can't cook, huh?" Harry laughs and takes a sip of his beer, or second, seeing as there's an empty bottle by the sink. Harry stirs the Alfredo sauce and turns the chicken.

"That would be a big, fat no." Louis chuckles, and stands off to the side, watching Harry cook. Louis always thought it was hot that Harry knew his way around a kitchen. Louis can see little beads of sweat forming on Harry's face from standing over the stove to make sure nothing burns.

"You still like mushrooms, right?" Harry asks, licking something off his finger.

Louis perks up, "Yes! I love mushrooms… Niall still yells at me, cause we have to get two pizza's."

They both laugh and Harry stirs the pasta, "Think you can handle straining the pasta?" Harry asks, with a taunting tone.

"Yes." Louis mocks back, rolling his eyes. "I'm not a complete tosser!" Louis grabs the strainer off the counter and places it in the sink, he grabs an oven mitt and puts in on his hand, he moves over to the stove, picks up the pot with the pasta in it and bring it over to the sink. Louis slowly pours the water and pasta into the strainer and watches as the water leaks out of the little holes.

"So proud…" Harry taunts again. And when Louis looks over, Harry's got the wooden spoon up and there's Alfredo sauce on it. Harry's hand is cupping underneath it so it doesn't drip. "Try some." Harry says and moves the spoon closer to Louis' mouth.

Louis hesitates for a moment, he locks eyes with Harry and blows on the sauce, making sure it's not too hot. He opens his lips and captures the end of the spoon, slurping the sauce into his mouth. As soon as he tastes the Alfredo sauce, Louis' eyes close and a soft moan escapes him.

"Oh my god, Harry!" Louis says and licks his lips, when he laps up all the sauce on the spoon. "That is so fuckin' good. When's it gonna be ready?" Louis asks, looking up at Harry.

Harry doesn't say anything, just looks at Louis. Or more importantly, Louis' lips. Just when Louis' about to say something to Harry, Harry brings his hand up to Louis' face, and runs his thumb along the corner of Louis' mouth. "Harry?" Louis whispers, his throat is bone dry all of a sudden. Harry brings his hand up to his own lips and sucks the Alfredo sauce off his finger, apparently there had been some still on Louis.

Louis' eyes are wide as he watches Harry. Louis licks his lips and tries to swallow again, he finds it difficult, so he picks up Harry's beer and takes a large gulp of it. When he places the beer back on the counter, Louis notices the chicken is starting to smoke. "Harry, the chicken!" Louis yells and moves to turn all of the knobs off.

That snaps Harry out of it, "Fuck!" He says and grabs a plate, he picks up tongs and scoops the chicken up with them. "Can you get bowls out of the cabinet?" Harry grumbles. He doesn't even turn around to ask. Harry proceeds to place the chicken on the plate and cuts them into strips.

Louis frowns, but does what Harry asks. He sees the bowls in the see-through glass door cabinet and grabs two large ones. Harry doesn't need to tell him what to do next. He grabs a spoon and distributes equal amounts of pasta into the bowls, he then pours the Alfredo sauce on top. The whole time they work, Louis can't help but think of how domestic they look making their meal together.

Louis is waiting for Harry to finish slicing the chicken into strips so they can place it on top of their pasta and dig in. Louis is starving. He's being polite and waiting for the chicken, when all he really wants to do is stuff his face. He's watching Harry, when all of a sudden Harry stops slicing and drops the knife onto the counter and turns to Louis.

"I'm sorry." Harry says simply, but his eyes are a raging storm.

"It's okay." Louis gives him a small smile, knowing Harry is talking about touching him the way he did. Louis' not sure what would have happened if the chicken hadn't started to smoke. He's almost positive he would have caved, the way Harry was looking at him.

"But it's not…" Harry says and rushes over to Louis in two small steps, placing one hand on Louis' hip and the other hand turns Louis' face so he can breathe in Louis' ear. "It's not okay…" Louis tenses when he feels Harry's body right up against his. He's too close, he's taking over Louis' senses, that's when Louis' brain turns to shit and he can't think of anything but Harry. Harry's body, his hands, his lips, his breath. It's all too much.

"Harry…" Louis squeaks weakly, his eyes slip shut when he feel Harry press even closer. Louis' hands grip the counter, he feels like he can't breathe.

"I want you too much…" Harry says, his voice desperate. "You're all I think about. Even while I was there. It was so fuckin' hard to leave you…" Harry growls the word 'fucking' into Louis' ear, his head knocking into Louis' when he says it. "I… I wish I could go back and change things―Bring you. It's a mistake I 'ave to live with everyday…" Harry's hand tightens on Louis' hip and it's taking all of Louis' brain power not to get hard. "But I don't want it to be the end of us…" Harry's lips brush against the skin behind Louis' ear and Louis can't help the whimper that escapes his mouth.

"H-harry… Don't…" Louis' whispers pathetically, even he doesn't believe the words he's saying. His hands grip the counter so tight it starts to hurt.

"Why?" Harry's teeth nip at the sharp point of Louis' jaw, right below his ear and Louis' knees go weak. "You want this… Us. I can feel it…" Harry says roughly as he pushes his thigh in between Louis'. None of his brain power is working, it's all being taken over by Harry. Harry could always get him like this. Even when he thinks of how badly Harry hurt him. Louis' mind, body and spirit still responds to every little thing Harry does. It was always what scared and excited him. Even now, cock getting harder with every word, touch and breath from Harry. "Don't you wanna be us again?" Harry asks and grinds his thigh into Louis' front.

A moan slips from Louis' lips and he hates himself. He has no control over himself. They aren't even doing anything and Louis is a fucking mess. But Harry's question brings him out of himself a bit, he swallows the breath caught in his throat and opens his eyes, "No…" He whimpers, and feels Harry freeze. Louis turns his head to locks eyes with Harry's, they are so dark, Louis can barely see any of that mossy green he's always loved. "No, Harry… We c-can't be us again…" He bites his lips when he sees Harry's face make a turn for the worst in mere seconds. Louis hesitantly brings a hand up to cup Harry's face and runs his thumb gently along Harry's cheekbone. It's the first time Louis' initiated a touch. "We've both changed. We… We're not the same people we used to be…"

"Lou…" A sob falls out of Harry's mouth and Louis can sees Harry's eyes start to water.

"But…" Louis starts, clearing his throat. The word makes Harry blink, causing a tear to slide down his cheek. Louis wipes it away immediately. "Maybe… The people we are now… D-deserve a chance." Louis says and rolls his bottom lip into his mouth. He doesn't know what he's thinking.

No, that's a lie, Louis knows exactly what's he's thinking. He's thinking that no one has ever made him feel like Harry does and no one probably ever will. He'd have be a fucking prat, tosser, asshole, fucking idiot to let the love of his life slip through his fingers over a mistake Harry is clearly just as heart broken over as he was.

As soon as the words are out of Louis' mouth a bright-as-the-fucking-sun smile forms on Harry's face. Both dimples appear, so deep it makes Louis' heart melt. Both of Harry's hands rush up to clasp the sides of Louis' neck, using his thumbs to push Louis face upwards more. It makes Louis' head spin how quickly Harry's expression changes. The look on Harry's face right now, Louis wants to take a photo of, blow it up so large it covers the walls in his room so it's the last thing he sees before he goes to bed and the first thing he sees when he wakes up.

"Are you serious?" Harry whispers, his forehead falling against Louis'.

"Maybe…" Louis teases, his voice shaky. His whole body is shaking really, ever since Harry's leg slipped between his. He can feel Harry's hot breath on his face and neck, it makes his skin heat up. "But we have to take things sl―"

In a split second Harry's lips are crashing down onto Louis'. Louis' eyes widen and a small high pitched whine hums in-between their lips. Both of Harry's hands move to Louis' hips and pull him even closer, Louis' hands fall to his side in shock. Harry's mouth latches onto Louis' bottom lip and sucks on it softly, his tongue traces the line of Louis' bottom lip, before moving in-between, knocking at the seam of Louis' lips with his tongue.

That wakes up Louis, his hands grasp onto Harry's biceps and he breathes out quickly through his nose. His heart beat is thumping like an 808, rapid and hard as he opens his mouth. Harry's tongue meets his in the middle, licking at each other softly, before Louis sucks Harry's tongue into his mouth.

A growl from Harry vibrates in Louis' mouth and one of Harry's hands move up to tilt Louis' head. The different angle makes their kiss better and deeper. Their teeth knock together and Harry juts his thigh up, grazing Louis' semi-hard cock.

"Shit…" Louis whines, his hands run up Harry's biceps and shoulders, crossing at the wrists behind Harry's neck, pulling him down some in the process, causing Harry's thigh to press harder.

As the kiss continues it just gets more and more intense. It's the kind of kiss people wish to give and receive. It's all consuming, the kind of kiss that washes all other kisses before it away. It's the kind of kiss that makes up for two years of lost time. Louis runs his tongue along the back of Harry's teeth before lightly tracing the indents on the roof of Harry's mouth.

A shiver runs down Harry's spine and his hips buck forwards, rucking against Louis'. "Lou…" Harry gasps, while coming up for air quickly. The fingers of one of his hands slip under Louis' shirt and grip the skin above Louis' briefs tightly. His mouth moves down to Louis' neck when Louis' head falls back, a moan falling from his lips and bouncing off the other wise quiet room. "Missed this so much…" Harry whispers against Louis' skin as he sucks on Louis' pulse. "You taste so fuckin' good…" He says and licks a thick wet stripe up Louis' neck and bites Louis' ear lobe when he gets there.

"Harry…" Louis moans, his wrists uncross and grip onto Harry's curls, tugging and pushing at the same time. His hips tilt up and meet Harry's, their hard ons knocking against one another.

Louis remembers his and Harry's sex life being phenomenal, but he doesn't remember it being this intense. They're only grinding against each other and Louis feels like he could come. He blames it on the fact that its been two years since he's been with Harry like this. Yea, that must be the reason.

One of Harry's hands move to the front of Louis' jeans and palms Louis. He pushes himself into Harry's hand further, all inhibitions and thoughts about them needing to slow down is thrown out the window. "Yea, Harry… F-fuck…"

Harry curls his hand around the outline of Louis' cock and rubs it with agonizing friction, "You're so fuckin' hard Lou." Harry grits out through his teeth, mouth against Louis' ear again. "You this hard for me, Louis?"

"Yea…" Louis breathes, looking down when he feels Harry's fingers start to work on his button and zipper.

"You want me to take care of you, Lou?" Harry asks, stepping back enough to pull out Louis' cock from the folds of his jeans and over the waistband of his briefs. Louis sighs with relief when his cock feels cool air against his heated skin, and he groans low in his throat when Harry's long and lovely fingers wrap around the base of his shaft. Louis nods, his mouth falls open, hot and ragged breathes rush out. Louis' stomach muscles start to contract when Harry starts to stroke him, his foreskin easing the way.

"Ugh… Ha-Harry… Yea…" Louis hands fall back onto the counter and grip its edge, his hips push out and fuck into Harry's fist. His eyes slips shut and he licks his dry lips.

"You look so fuckin' good like this?" Harry groans his Louis' ear, nipping at the soft flesh. "You 'ave no idea how many times I would think about you like this…" Harry twists his hand at the head of Louis' cock and Louis slips down a little. Thank God he's holding onto the counter. "How many times I wanted to call you… Tell you how you made me feel. Even across the fuckin' world." Harry latches onto the skin between Louis' shoulder and neck, he bites down hard as his hand works Louis' shaft. Louis' precum and foreskin making it so Harry's hand just flies up and down his cock.

Louis tries to swallow and breathe in the large intakes of air he needs. "I'm close." Louis gasps, his forehead furrows and he can feel little beads of sweat forming at his hairline.

"No." Harry huffs in Louis' face, sucks Louis' bottom lip into his mouth quickly before falling to his knees in front of Louis.

As soon as Louis feels Harry move away from him, he opens his eyes. The view before him almost makes him lose his shit.

"Want you to cum like this." Harry states as he grabs the base of Louis' cock again, pulling the foreskin all the way down, so the shiny, slick head fully appears. Harry wastes no time going in for the kill. He strokes Louis a couple of times before leaning forward and engulfing Louis' cock head into his mouth

Louis' knees buckle as Harry's tongue circles around the head of his cock, flicking the bundle of nerves under the head. "Oh, fuck! Ha-Harry…" Harry bobs down, taking about four inches in his mouth before he bobs back up. He swirls his tongue around Louis' head then bobs back down.

Harry repeats this a couple times, before pulling his mouth off, his hand still stroking Louis. "You're so fuckin' thick, Lou." Harry says, placing open mouths kisses along Louis' shaft. "You're givin' my jaw a work out…" He chuckles and nips at Louis' foreskin. He draws abstract patterns on the underside of Louis' cock with his tongue. "I love it though…" Harry says before capturing Louis' leaking head in his mouth again, moaning as he sinks back down.

Louis' thighs are shaking, they're spread as far as his jeans will allow. Which isn't very far, considering they're barely down his thighs. But Louis is too far gone to care. One hand moves to Harry's head and grips the soft curls, causing Harry to moan around him. The vibrations make the coiling in his stomach tighten. "Harry, fu-fuck… Your mouth… You s-suck my cock so fuckin' good… So good."

"C'mon, Lou… Wanna taste you." Harry says up at him, before bobbing back down and relaxing his jaw as much as he can so he can sink down enough so he feels Louis tickle the back of his throat.

Louis watches his entire length disappear inside Harry's mouth. And that's no small feat. Louis is trying so hard to keep his eyes open so he can watch the way Harry's skillful mouth works him over, but his orgasm is fast approaching. The tingling at the bottom of his spine is slowly creeping up to the rest of his body. "I'm so close… I…"

Harry pulls up quickly, sucking in a big breath through his nose, before sinking back down. He flattens and wiggles his tongue to help push Louis to the back of his throat. The sounds coming from Louis are enough to make Harry never want to stop, no matter how much his jaw is aching with the stretch. Harry moves a hand to Louis' balls, rolling them in his palm, he brings the fingers from his other hand to wonder behind Louis' balls. His fingertips pet at Louis' perineum and just barely brush Louis' hole.

Louis' hips snap forward, overwhelmed by everything Harry's doing, and pushes his cock impossibly further into Harry's throat causing Harry to choke loudly. The sound alone is what makes Louis cum, making Harry choke even further. He tightens his hold on Harry's head, keeping him in place, letting jets of his spunk fill Harry's mouth and shoot down his throat. "Oh my fuckin' God… Shit, fuck… Harry!" He can feel Harry struggling against his hand, trying to push off his cock, but Louis doesn't let up. He empties his load into Harry's mouth, shuddering violently, loud moans filling the quiet kitchen, while Harry's scratches and claws at Louis' thighs.

Louis feels like every single inch of his skin is tingling. He can feel his cock pulsing as the last few drops of cum leak into Harry's throat. He can feel Harry's esophagus constrict around him as Harry chokes and gags. Louis can't even remember the last blow-job that made him cum that hard. His breathing is coming out in ragged increments.

When his feels the last of his orgasm surge out of him, Louis loosens his hold on Harry, who's face is beat red and tears are streaking down his face. Harry practically falls off Louis' cock, his whole length sliding out of Harry's mouth all at once. Harry keels over, placing his hands on his knees, his head hanging low as he sucks in huge gulps of air.

"Shit." Louis says, quickly wiping off his dick of any left over cum, and puts himself back in his briefs. He kneels down in front of Harry and rubs his back. "Shit Harry, I'm so sorry…" Louis soothes his hands through Harry's hair, twirling the strands with his fingers.

"S'okay." Harry rasps out, body heaving and shaking. His voice is deep and hoarse. If Louis wasn't so worried, he'd probably find Harry's tone outrageously sexy.

"I almost choked you to death!" Louis says, as his shuffles closer to Harry on his knees.

"What a way to go." Harry chuckles, but starts coughing.

Louis reaches over the counter and grabs Harry's lukewarm beer. He hands Harry the beer and goes back to rubbing Harry's back. When Harry straightens his back and leans up, Louis almost chokes on his breath. Harry has cum and saliva strings dripping from his wrecked mouth. Instead of giving Harry a chance to get a sip of his beer, Louis rushes forward and captures Harry's lips.

A surprised 'mmm' comes from Harry as the two topple over and Harry lands on his back on his kitchen floor with Louis on top of him, straddling his hips. Even though Harry can barely breath he kisses Louis back with everything Louis is giving him. It's harsh and unskilled and messy. Harry has no idea how he manages to place the beer bottle on the floor beside them and not spill it.

Louis can taste his cum in Harry's mouth as their tongues slide against on another. He can feel his chin and mouth getting wet from the spit and cum that had been dripping from Harry's lips. He bites Harry's lips quickly before pulling off Harry's mouth and moving down to lap up the mess on Harry's chin.

When Harry is all cleaned up Louis sits up and wipes his own mouth with the back of his hand. He slowly grinds down onto Harry, only to have Harry whine out and grab onto his hips, halting Louis.

"C'mon Harry…" Louis tries to push Harry's hands off. "Wanna make you cum."

A soft rumble of dazed laughter escapes from Harry's chest, little rough chuckles come out of his still panting mouth. "Y-you already did." Harry says lowly.

"Wha-" Louis moves his hand behind his ass to grab at Harry's cock, only to find he's not hard anymore. "Wha―I didn't even touch you." Louis says in shock.

"Guess I like it when you make me choke on your cock." Harry giggles, his arms flop down onto the hardwood floor by his head.

"Fuck." Louis huffs out and falls forward, to hover over Harry, his hands on either side of Harry's head. Harry's still breathing hard, so Louis uses his arms as leverage to keep his upper body from squishing Harry.

"That's why I was strugglin'… I was scared I was gonna bite your cock off while I was cummin'." Harry laughs at Louis outraged face.

"Well thanks for not doing that." Louis smiles, "I'm quite fond of that part of myself."

"Yea, me too." Harry chuckles and brings a hand up to grasp the back of Louis neck, bringing him down so their lips meet again. This kiss is a lot more gentle and soft, in comparison to the others. Their lips move against one another like it's what they were created to do. There's barely any tongue, but every once in a while one of them will lick at the others lips or suck in the others bottom lip. The kiss is very slow and lazy.

Harry only pulls away when he feels the cum in his briefs start to cool. "I need to go clean up." He states, and pushes Louis up.

"Huh?"

Harry just looks down at his crotch and Louis understands.

"Oh, shit. Sorry."

"It's okay." Harry pats a hand against Louis' hip and Louis moves to get up, holding his hand out to help Harry get up as well, once he's fully standing. "Why don't you reheat this…" Harry nods over to the forgotten Chicken Alfredo, "I'm gonna go clean up and change."

"Alright." Louis smiles, and squeaks when Harry's slaps his ass before walking out of the kitchen.

Louis moves over to where the bowls of pasta are still sitting, he grabs the plate the chicken is on and gives each bowl equal chicken slices. He then grabs each bowl in one hand and walks over to where the microwave is. Placing one bowl on the counter he opens the microwave door and puts the other bowl in, closes the door and hits the express button three times, for three minutes.

While he's waiting for the food to heat up, Louis just stares at the bowl going around and around in the microwave, getting lost in his own thoughts.

Now that he's come down and his breathing is back to normal, Louis can really think about what's happened today. He thinks about everything Harry confessed to him and his heart melts. He was so angry at Harry for so long, but at the same time… He can't hold the grudge he had when Harry left. It was half hearted at best anyway.

Louis thinks about Bastille's 'Bad Blood' lyrics, _"All this bad blood here, won't you let it dry? It's been cold for years, won't you let it lie?"_

He knows he can't hold onto the hurt and pain forever, its not healthy. He wants Harry in his life. Of course Louis wishes Harry would have talked to him more about everything when he'd left. But they were young, Harry said he made a mistake, and he's regretted it everyday. Louis' not going to hold onto the anger, just because its easier. Louis' may be stubborn, but he'd have to be an idiot to pass up what he and Harry have.

Louis thinks of everything Harry has said today, about why he left and what he wanted and how he'd wanted everything to happen. Louis believes Harry when he'd said he regretted not asking Louis to go with him. Louis understands the trepidation Harry had had, about them and taking Louis away from school. He can understand the logic, Louis' not a completely unrealistic person. It doesn't make up for the past two years, but it's a start.

The microwave beeps and Louis shakes his head and focuses, he switches out the bowls and hits the express button three times again. This time Louis makes himself busy. He picks up the beer off the floor and pleases it on the counter. He brings all the dirty dishes to the sink, and he moves to the fridge to grab him and Harry two new beers.

He dips his fingers into the bowl of pasta and picks up a noodle strand covered in Alfredo sauce, he honestly is starving. Louis plops the noodles in his mouth and chews. He takes a sip of his beer and hears rustling around from the living room. He starts walking in that direction.

"Shit." He hears Harry whisper loudly. Like he'd forgotten something.

Louis just makes his through the doorway, beer in hand, when he sees Harry standing in the middle of the living room. He's clad only in tiny black briefs, he's got one hand on his hip, while the other is pointing the remote at the TV.

"I totally forgot about the game." Harry says, and gives Louis a slight frown, before looking back at the television, "Sorry, I know how much you hate missin' the beginnin' of the matches." Harry says and looks through the channels to find the sports channel.

Louis is just standing in the doorway taking in Harry, he hears the microwave beep, but he can't bring himself to move and look away from Harry. LA most have really agreed with him. Harry had always been the most beautiful person Louis had ever seen, but in the two years apart Harry had really grown and filled out, not to mention covered himself in tattoos.

His legs are longer, they seem to never end, his thighs look like pure muscle. Harry's stomach is well defined and Louis can count numerous abdominal ridges, forming his six pack, as well as the ever popular 'V' at his hips. His pecs and chest look firm and his biceps have more definition then Louis ever remembered them having.

"Louis… What channel is the match on?" Harry's forehead furrows as he try's to think. It's been forever since he's watched sports, and all the channel numbers have escaped his mind.

Louis' eyes take in Harry's tattoos next. There are no many, Louis loses count. The one that had caught his eye first was the two swallows on his chest, and the next was the big moth on Harry's upper ribs. He also sees a large ship on Harry's bicep as well as random tattoos surrounding it. He sees a lot of scripts on Harry's body. There's words on his right pec, right over his heart but Louis can't see the actual words. He's got an anchor on his calf, and script wrapped around both ankles.

"Louis…" Harry looks over and sees Louis just standing there gawking at him. He smiles, taking pride in knowing that Louis likes what he sees. "Lou!" Harry yells loudly, and Louis shakes his head a little.

Louis' brain has far too many dirty thoughts running through it. He's never wanted anyone as much as he's wanted Harry. Even after all this time.

"Hmm?" Louis hums and looks up and locks eyes with Harry.

Harry just chuckles, "What bloody channel is the ManU match on?"

"Oh… Um six." Louis says and turns around, walking back into the kitchen.

He moves back over to the microwave and gets out Harry's bowl. He dips his fingers into his bowl again and picks up a piece of chicken this time. He bites into the chicken and feels hands wrap around him from behind.

"You okay?" Harry asks as he leans his head down on Louis' shoulder.

"Yea…" Louis says and pats Harry's hands around his waist. He turns around, still in Harry's grip, until they're face to face. "Of course…" Louis smiles as he looks up into Harry's bright eyes. "Just hungry." He moves his hand over to his bowl and picks up a couple strands of pasta. "You hungry?" He asks and moves his hand over to Harry. Harry just smiles and tilts his head back so the pasta can fall in his open mouth.

Harry chuckles as he chews, swallows, and tilts his head back and opens his mouth when he wants more.

Louis smiles and picks up chicken as well as pasta with his fingers. "Baby bird." Louis laughs, cause it really looks like a mama bird feeding her young a worm. Harry's tongue wraps around the end of a piece of pasta and slurps it into his mouth, getting Alfredo sauce all over his chin. "Messy baby bird." They both laugh and Harry leans down to kiss Louis' lips quickly.

He knows it means something that it's this easy to fall back into this kind of routine with Harry. It shouldn't be this easy. It shouldn't feel this good. But it does.

Harry leans over to finger pick at the pasta, in doing so he moves away from Louis slightly and Louis can finally read the script that is written over Harry's heart, _'two against the world'_

His breath gets caught in his throat and his hand comes up to graze the skin. Louis' finger tips trace the cursive words and he feels his eyes start water.

"You remembered." Is all Louis says, voice barely a whisper.

Harry looks over at Louis and down to his chest, where Louis' eyes are glued. He drops the pasta he was going to feed to Louis and places his clean hand on Louis' jaw, making him look up at Harry. "Of course I remembered…" Harry's thumb runs up and down Louis' jaw. "That's not just something you forget."

"I… I was scared you'd forgotten me there." Louis says, referring to LA.

"You're not someone I could ever forget, Lou." Harry grips the side of Louis' neck and kisses him again.

The kiss is just their lips pressed together tightly, but between them, it says a lot.

"Fuck, I missed you." Louis finally allows himself to tell Harry.

Harry chuckles and wraps his arms around Louis in a tight hug, both being careful not to get their food covered hands on the other.

"I missed you so much, sometimes I could barely think straight."

Louis didn't know what to say next, so they just stood there in the kitchen holding each other. Their heads buried in the others neck and their arms wound so tight around the other it almost hurt. But it was the best kind of hurt, so they stayed put.


End file.
